I have a piece of advice for you


You want to believe that the person of your dreams, the job opportunity of a lifetime, the lottery win or the surprise that you never expected is waiting around the corner for you. When you’re unhappy with where you are, you irrationally hope that a drastic change in your life will come along and save you from your sad life.

But the truth of the matter is, life doesn’t work that way. Nobody’s heading your way on a white horse and if you want to see the change in your life, you have to create it by your action.

This is what I know. When times get tough, I rely on myself, without looking for the rescue because I know that people are always going to be more aware of their own needs than they are of mine.

Unfortunately, other people around you are there stretching your limits, and they will nonetheless push you unless and until they encounter resistance. Most people are going to take as much from you as you let them get away with – which means it’s up to you to define when to say 'Yes' and when to say 'No'.

I have learned and I'm not afraid to say 'No,' to what I don’t want to do – because I know that nobody’s going to make me happy if I'm not satisfied with myself in my own eyes.

If you listen to what people want from you, you'll end up living a lifeless, shapeless, emotionless life. And then someone would come along and tell you that you have to be the more interesting person.

The truth is, it’s impossible to please everybody. There will always be someone who’s offended or bored by your words. You’re going to be criticized no matter what you do, so you might as well do what you want. Because if there’s anyone whose judgment you should listen to, it’s your own.

You may be the coolest, kindest, smartest, most interesting person in the world, but if you don't see that by yourself and actually put those traits into action, you have nothing to complain about.

You can spend your entire life feeling sorry for yourself because you deserve more than you’re getting, or you can go out into the world and actually claim what’s yours. Guess which choice is better?

You can spend your entire life loudly asking others to help you because you don’t have the time, money or energy to accomplish the things you actually want. And all of what you claim may be honest but the truth is, every single person has at least interest to help you in your life's struggle. They have the same problems as you.

Try to ignore your excuses. Find a way around your limitations, instead of just bitching about them.

You can sit indoors all day conceptualizing a better world, but until you get out there and start acting, you’re not actually making a difference. Good intention is a wonderful thing but unless it’s coupled with action, it counts for nothing.

At the end of the day, you are determined as a being by what you do, not by what you think about.

This is one more piece of advice I have for you: don't get impatient. Even if things are so tangled up you can't do anything, don't get desperate or blow a fuse and start yanking on one particular thread before it's ready to come undone. You have to realize it's going to be a long process and that you'll work on things slowly, one at a time.

- Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood


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