Friday, February 8, 2019

Life is sweetness and light among shame and confusion


This title comes from Leo Tolstoy's last book, Resurrection. I like the book, it is the story of a man tormented by the injustices of society and his own mistakes in life. As a reader you will probably like the man but at the same time you will fear it too, since it is possible that you may find your own weaknesses.   

I am not a guy who likes to fight and who argues a lot. I make decision quickly and I try to cut the bullshit at the very moment I see it. Sometimes I make wrong decisions because I am so fast in making them but I am also okay at admitting my own mistakes. But... most of the time, I am right.

In the last months I have changed. I am tired of empty expectations. I am not so exiting to be with anyone for a longer period. The people bring with themselves only their problems. I don't want to be a garbage bag where they constantly dump their self-made bullshit.

As we grow older, as time is passing by, we are becoming more and more a cowards. With age we lack the courage to do or endure unpleasant things. Some of us appear as cynics but actually we are just timid, easily intimidated personas.

We live our life. Many of you are on completely different routes than I am, so to talk about truth is not applicable. Truth is relative. In my 54 years I have concluded that there is not such thing as truth. If I need to define it, I would say, the truth is what is necessary, everything else are lies. You may have concluded something else... it doesn't matter.

The bottom line is, there’s no meaning to life, no reward for achieving all the things we've achieved. And please, stop saying that things were better back then in our youth. When we were young, the life was cheaper, happier and people were nicer. Oh well, that's not only wrong but not cool as well.

Be courageous, enough to fulfill what is necessary fully understanding that there is nothing awaiting you. Live, fight, like it matters...

Do. Whatever. Fuck. You Want. The life is your show. It is your universe. Who else knows about your thoughts and feelings? There is no one else there, you are completely on your own. Everything is available to you. No one else can lead you, pull you, push you or carry you. No one else is necessary for you. Collect yourself fast and cut the crap out of your life and realize your own bullshit.

Guess what? Life is hard for everyone. It’s not supposed to be easy. If we want a different life, no one is going to change it for us. Stop for a moment and clearly see...

We’ll stop living some day, we want to think we're immortal, but we aren’t. We behave like we are, the nature takes care that we have no notion of our own death. We always want more and better... and we're saving for a retirement in order to start living. It is a madness.

Everyone around us is going to die. So we need to love people around us and tell them that we love them. We must be brave enough to freely express our love. To say it loudly. To tell people that matter to us that they matter to us.. nothing else does.




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