Dizziness



Do you remember Saturday Night Fever, the famous movie starring John Travolta? Then, you know the feeling of preparation to go out... that's how I feel right now.

I am going to Reservoir Lounge with my new date I met yesterday. I wear the tightest t-shirt, not caring for a cold weather, I am  ready for a good time. I like her, she is a quiet, beautiful woman. We met yesterday, had dinner at Danforth and we ended up at my place. We watched a romantic comedy "How to lose a guy in 10 days" a great movie, we laughed drinking wine and we had a good time. She slept over, I made a breakfast, we went for a long walk around noon and she went to her home. We are meeting tonight again.... Well, it appears, I just got a girlfriend.

I am having three more invitation to meet other women on match but I am going to cancel all that.

Yesterday, I did my second yoga practice this year, early in the morning, according to the schedule. I feel great, my body is rested and full of energy. 

I know, I am not a perfect guy and I don’t take criticism as an insult. Nobody is perfect. I had great or not so great relationships with my girlfriends but it all came to the end. Is it problem in me or in them? Maybe, I'm not looking for permanent relationship, maybe, I'll never settle down. It is true, I strive hard to be emotionally independent of everyone.

It's not that I didn't love my former girlfriends, because well I did! And even I was the one to initiate the breakup I came to that point only after a lot of thinking and waiting for a change.

They didn't understand me. But it is so plain and so obvious and so simple. I live my life in the present moment. This is not just an empty phrase, I don't have imagination and wishful thinking. I live life as it comes, not holding desperately to old habits and established routines. 

There is nothing for me to gain, lose, achieve or abandon. 

The greatest obstacle for being happy is the belief that there is something wrong with right now or with the way that life is. That is pretty obvious, isn't it! As long as we are searching for something other than what we have, we will never be content and happy.

Everyone wants more of life. Everyone wants to be loved, for love is an addiction. Everyone consumes the delusions of love like a drug, because it helps us feel alive, like we are still the little children who twirl and twirl and get dizzy.

Everyone loves dizziness...



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