Thursday, November 5, 2020

The Ultimate Disappointment

The ultimate disappointment? No. I am not talking about the elections in USA. Although I consider the happenings in USA as very important, I am not going to comment about it. I know very well that the outcome of the elections will be felt in the entire world and yet, I leave it to others to worry about it.

And no, I am not talking about my blog. I used to have 1000 post's views in a day and now there is about 30 to 50 views. The majority of readers don't like my blog. They come once or twice and they are gone forever. Almost no one comes from google search engine and that tells me that my blog is excluded from the google search. So be it. I write these pages for myself, you can read it or not, it is up to you.

I spoke with my friends who sometimes read my blog and they told me that my blog is extremely gloomy because it emphasizes meaninglessness, falseness, dream and misery. Usually, the awakening and yoga blogs speak of happiness, love, beauty and bliss. Well, what to say about it? We must thread awakening by seeing the experience of life as it is. We must see the truth of suffering, the reality of dissatisfaction.

As long as we follow awakening which promising liberation, miracles, expansion of consciousness, bliss then we are bound to bullshit. We expect that spiritual teaching can solve our worldly problems, raise us from depression, calm our aggression, solve our drinking problems. However, this will never happen.

The attainment of enlightenment from only point of view we now have, the ego's point of view, is something no one expects. It is an extreme death, the death of self, the death of "me" and "mine". It is the ultimate and final disappointment that life can brings us.  

Awakening is painful. It is constant unmasking of our own illusions, our hopes and beliefs. And slowly, walking the path we are becoming more and more lonely, a desolate and empty personas who is slowly losing its character, our very thoughts that makes us human being.

Whoever follow the path of awakening have to give up the the discursive thoughts, the mind. But to be frank, quite possible there is no such thing as spiritual path after all except cutting down our own imagination and self deception. Giving up the imagination is only spiritual practice. Other than that there is no awakening.

The main reason for our slavery is our belief that inner (thoughts) and outside (world) events are true!

If our relationships aren’t fulfilling, or if we’re struggling financially, or if we're depressed, we believe that if we simply practice positive thinking we’ll be rewarded with peace of mind. No, even with positive thinking we are still a slave to our own mind.

Recognize that everything, including the sense of "I" is false. See that the world is but a show, glittering and empty. Realize that all is nothing. Check every desire and see where they're leading you. See that all objects including our relation to mother, father, children, friends etc. are untrue. Understand that all our relationships are ready to fool us. See our own meaninglessness...

These are the first words of truth - not truth in quotation marks but truth in the real meaning of the word. Truth which is not merely theoretical, not simply a word, but truth that must be realized on the "path" of awakening.
When we see for ourselves the truth, we will collapse in fear and confusion and we will acquire the greatest virtue of this world... humility. Until that happens to us, changing our beliefs is all theoretical and irrelevant.

This society wants us to be somebody, and we accept the game and no one wants to be a nobody. We are frustrated in our quest for significance. Our present system of elitism allows a select few to "succeed". For the majority, the life is just waiting and wanting.

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