My spiritual journey started on January 2, 2002.
On that day I went with my ex and some friends to a dinner at ZAM restaurant in Toronto, it was celebration of the New Year. When we were returning home I was driving car and then just before our condo I saw enormous planet, right there, in front of my eyes. Maybe it was moon, but I checked it was not a full moon, that night the moon was in waning phase. What I saw that night was magnificent.
When we came home I could not sleep. I went on the net and randomly searched pages and I stumble upon Emerald Tablets of Thoth, The Atlantean. I read it but I did not understand anything, but some kind of light appear in left corner of my eye. It was there in front of me for quite some time.
I, THOTH, the Atlantean, master of mysteries,keeper of records, mighty king, magician,living from generation to generation,being about to pass into the halls of Amenti,set down for the guidance ofthose that are to come after,these records of the mighty wisdom of Great Atlantis.
It is then that I decided to become a saint. Once there is no more personality, you are a saint. That is your final destination, the goal of all your numberless births. Sainthood isn't given by a church or any religious leader. It's granted to you by your own dedication.
Next day I stepped on my spiritual path and now after 21 years here I am.
In these 21 years I had all kind of experiences, I completely lost my mind couple of times but I will not about my experiences. They are interesting but they have no real value in the process of awakening.
I met three Saints. What I noticed about all of them is a kind of warm
coldness in their interactions with others. They are all compassionate but
if you look closely they are not really attached to the stories they
hear.
In March 2002 I bought a large LED TV and I got rid of my
old TV and when I was doing that, there, outside, beside the condo's garbage
bin, was my first spiritual teacher - Zen Master Jim Marshal. He was a
caretaker of my condo, a superintendent.
I remember as it was
yesterday, he was smoking, joking with some neighbors and I was coming
caring the TV and I said... no more CNN! He laughed and we started talking.
We talked a lot during period of 10 years. He never revealed itself for what
he is, but as time was passing and I was "improving" I saw he
understands everything what I am passing through.
It is
difficult for me to describe him. There was no "man" in him, no "posture" no
strict rules just laughter and numerous stories about life. He never
disagreed with me, he never gave me advice. Last time I saw him was after my
divorce and when I moved to High Park I'd never seen him again.
In September 2005, my friend from work was going to meet his teacher from
India Maa Sarweshwari
He asked me to join him. I did. When I met her for the first time, when
she entered the room, it was like some dark, heavy blanket has covered my
mind. I was without thoughts completely.
I visited her with my
ex wife after that and I was talking with her about various things. Well,
she did not talk but she replied on my questions by writing in her
pad.
She gave me a lot of advises and even she gave me one dollar bill, which I
still keep, for prosperity. She liked me a lot, my friend is in touch with
her all these years and she regularly asks for me, how I am
doing.
The class was so difficult but the music, energy from the teacher and the energy in the room carried me forward to the end. I had the best shavasana ever, after the class I was in heaven. I decided to take two more classes with him.
