
Sunday night, I'm making plans for the next week.
Every year, people make New Year's resolution, hoping to spark change in their
behavior. The list of what they want to change is quite predictable. Every
year the list includes something on the line of health and fitness, money
savings and learning of new subjects for personal and professional
development.
That's all. They say New Year's resolution last until 3rd week of January
which is exactly the reason I'm asking you about it. How is your New Year's
resolution going?

Last week I bought a reading lamp.
I'll spend more time reading before sleep.
I don't follow the crowd. We are coming to the end of January and I'm
pressing harder than ever. Because I choose to. I just finished 9th yoga
practice from the beginning of January, I went 4 times to gym this month, I
walked every second day, I did not drink beer at all but I failed in regards
to my daily sleeping rule.
I did not quite follow rule #4 Stop Daily Sleeping. I get up early, very
early, 4 or 4:30 am and I get tired during a day so I sleep after work,
mostly at 4 pm. I need to pay more attention to this.

I filled my fridge, food for the week.
Next week I'll lead my life by strict schedule. I will get up at 5 am, I'm
setting up the clock alarm, which will signal when I can get up. Yoga
practice at 7 am. Work until 4 pm.... then long walking on a freezing
weather. Gym around 7 or 8 pm and then reading and sleeping... at
10pm.
Today I bought the groceries for a week. I spend $190 and I'm not going to
spend any money during a week, well until Friday. I have nothing left on my
accounts and I have to pay the corporate tax in the February so I have to
save money.
This year, I would like to stay true to myself trying to get what I want
from life, but it won't be easy. I have set my intention to be always aware,
with the attention on the sense of presence. I investigate a question "From where did this I am sense coming form?" and I'm not getting answer but I'm seeing myself in the new light.

I'm ready for the next week. Let's do it...
I noticed I easy promise things. The most of the time I do what I promise,
especially to my daughter or friends. But sometime I simply
cannot do what I promise to do. That makes me nervous and I get angry on
myself. I must stop promising... completely.
Why do I do that I really don't know. Maybe I'm insecure, maybe I
want to look better in their eyes, maybe I promise things, especially to buy
gifts, because I want to impress them.
I should stop doing that. I'll make a new habit, I'm going to say "I'll see but I don't promise" for anything that I do. That's it. I need to be aware, a consciousness
human being.