...as D.H. Lawrence said, but how we live? We live like slaves, like mindless robots going through the motions of life, but not really alive.
I try to have a constant awareness of that fact. For me, the most important thing in life is nothing related to the world... it is neither money nor fame. My major goal in life is self-realization. Basically, I'm trying to find the receipt for who I am in case I need to return myself.
The spirituality is a major thing in everyone's life. It is a science of knowing ourselves as we really are without imagination and wishful thinking.
We lost signal but we keep confidently recalculating our route to nowhere
In life, we want to be big-time players. We want to have money, live in a large house, drive an expensive car... We want to be with a woman of our dreams. We want unconditional love, happiness, and bliss. But what about our fears? Fears are what stop us from getting what we want. Those fears are our irrational phobias.
We don't know who we are so we are afraid. Underneath all of our actions stays this basic fear of not knowing ourselves. Then, we fear being confident and knowing what we want. If we don't know what we want, how can we be happy?
When I observe people, as they are, I'm noticing an uneasiness in their behavior. I see their protective shield from the threatening feeling of embarrassment and ridiculousness, the same energy as my 88 years old dad trying to use iPhone.
Without self-knowledge, we are sorry little things, basically cowards
Our world is a confusing place because we're confused. My friends, I am happy and relaxed and free despite of the f**king world. It is not that I have no problems in my life. It's not that I have nothing to regret or complain about. It's not that I am doing what I want... I just let go of whatever it comes, like a cat who has understood that it has no responsible for gravity.
We are actually not going anywhere! We're only convinced ourselves that we are going somewhere, like a squirrel on a hamster wheel who thinks he’s training for a marathon.
So, we are waiting for the perfect job, perfect spouse, perfect house, and retirement with a lot of sunshine and long walks on the beach. However, the subtext of our current life is in the future. We are missing the present, we are really missing life, but so what, we take care of our Facebook page, world peace, our health, prosperity, and so on. Priorities!
Our life is like a race car without an engine. It looks very cool: large house, a good job, happy kids... but it has no engine. We slip in behind the wheel like a foot slips into a shoe, and then we make vroom sounds and turn the wheel and shift gears and pretend we're rocketing toward retirement.
But when we get tired of it in five or ten years, we'll get out of that exactly where we got into it. Lonely, tired, and disappointed. We have missed the awakening. We forgot to check if the car had an engine before we spent 30 years making race car noises.
In this world, there is so much suffering which is not necessary at all. I'm not talking about the suffering of people in Ukraine or Cuba, that is different; I'm referring to our inner suffering, our agonizing attempts to prove something to others.
The truth is very simple: "we" do not exist
"I", "you", "we" is a sense, just like we feel cold or hot; that's how we feel self-existence. On the other hand, our existence is beyond our self. In reality, there is a constant stream of thoughts which glue our attention and there we go, "we" have been created, out of nothing, like a software glitch that started paying a mortgage.
Can anything be created from nothing? It appears that "you" exist but it doesn't mean that is true. It’s like the "check engine" light in the car with no engine. A persistent, confusing lie.
Our thinking and our beliefs are the cause of our failure to wake up.
We don't see what's perfectly obvious
We do things to earn money, to get rid of stress, and to have a happy life. The smoke and mirrors! It’s a circus, and we’re the clowns who are also the audience, and we’re not even laughing.
By having lots of money, a large house, and a new car are things to keep us fooled, and they maintain our self-deception. Our happiness is ill-defined: it's about acquiring it, it's not about enjoying it.
We are so busy, we don't have time for the enjoyment anyway. Our schedule is packed with things to maintain the illusion that we have a schedule.
We think that a "soul" or a "spirit" is necessary to do what we do and live as we live. But perhaps it is just enough to have a key for winding up the spring of our mechanism. A daily portion of food helps us to wind up and renew our purposeless web of associations again and again. From this background, we select separate thoughts in an attempt to connect them into a whole and pass them off as valuable and as our own.
We pick up your feelings and sensations, moods and experiences, and out of all this, we create the mirage of inner life, call ourselves conscious and reasoning beings, talk about yoga, meditation, God, about eternity, about eternal life, and other "high" matters.
We speak about everything imaginable, judge, discuss, define, evaluate, but we omit to talk about ourselves, about who we really are, about our real value, for we are convinced that if there is anything lacking in us, we can buy it or we can learn it.
Awakening is neither no mind, blank mind, empty mind, nor stopped mind
Awakening is not Nirvana. Nir means not or without and vana means a flame. A desire-less mind is an oxymoron. Awakening is not The Now. Awakening is neither the Oneness nor any other transcendental state; such states of consciousness are experiences. Awakening is not the Ethereal Bliss. Awakening is neither a special status nor some kind of attainment.
We are awake when we clearly see that our beliefs, knowledge, understanding, experience, the world, our life, our self-sense... when we clearly see that none of it mean anything. When we see clearly that "we" do not exist, then it begins... and we realize the ultimate joke was on us, the whole time.
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