Having a daily yoga practice is not that hard. What is hard is letting go of laziness to stand on the mat everyday. If I really want a consistent daily ashtanga practice, I need to set my daily sleeping patterns more firmly and overcome laziness, fatigue and tiredness.
The great thing about ashtanga is that it'll continue to improve through life and age has nothing to do with ability in yoga. Indeed, practicing ashtanga yoga daily into 60s is my goal. It will keep me fit, confident, strong, flexible, mentally and physically balanced, and of course self-disciplined.
I have nothing to do, nowhere to go. I feel lost and alienated from this world. I don't believe in relationships and I'm not sure does family has any value at all.
Instead of living the life that suits me, I'm looking at my faults, constantly bending myself to this society who desperately trying to fit me in the corner that others had placed out for me. I'm compromising, observing and blending, read, selling my soul time and time again.
I see the practice of ashtanga yoga as an answer to stop all that and to unlock the secret to happiness. It turns me around toward myself. The practice shows me that I have choices. Everything that is in front of me is here because I, and I alone, have put it there. I see it is a time to call myself out and to face my life as it is.
Looking in the mirror I have no idea who I am. How can I possibly expect anyone else to knows me when I'm a confused and distorted mess, a mixture of everyone I have allowed to influence me, along with all the negative self-beliefs I've somehow inflicted on myself.

I clearly see that I'm not living the life destined for me, I'm living for everyone else and I am doing a pretty bad job of it.
I've no intention to visit other places. Ashtanga yoga put me in the present moment with no future and no past.
I'm not interested in something new, new hobbies, new books, new relationship. I don't give a damn if I am single or not. I don't care of changing my eating habits. I don't want to stop smoking and drinking.
Let it be as it is. Each time I mess up, I confront it and I face it. Why, what and how have these things happen? What have I learned? And the answer is always the same... nothing. There is nothing to be learned from life, society, world, people...

Ashtanga practice thought me to live now in the moment between two breaths. I've discovered that when I'm there, I'm far less likely to keep tripping up. Although I do mistakes, I see things sooner and understand the reasons behind my mistakes. All my mistakes have been done because I was believing the thing was true.
Thinking something is true is my bad conditioning. Believing in nice loving relationship, honest family, true friends, the honest world with beautiful people, I attracted all kinds of rubbish into my life.
But ashtanga practice showed me that I am never the same person on the mat doing it, so also others are not the same. As soon as I unlearned all of the rubbish about my uniqueness and how special I am, I began to feel the presence more. My reality is a mirror and whatever is going on in the inside myself, is radiating out.

This repetitive, stubborn and hard practice has made me realize that I'm living a lie, living according to society’s expectations of me.
I've stopped thinking about other people. And I've stopped caring about what people are thinking about me. I've stopped caring if people are liking how I'm dressed, what I say, or if they value my opinion or not.
Ashtanga practice is hard and ultimately self-defeating endeavor. But it thought me no to give a shit about anyone or anything. And that, is liberating and refreshing and simply the best and most loving thing this practice ever did for me.