From Zee with love

I wrote this to you

I'm an immature guy but right there in my simplicity lies my readiness to let go of everything. There are certain people in my life I'm attached to, and this post is for them, to my close ones.
If a man is deprived of his illusions, imagination and all that prevents him from seeing reality - if he is deprived of his interests, his cares, expectations and hopes - all his striving would collapse, everything would become empty and there would remain an empty being, an empty body, only physiologically alive.

This would be the death of "I", the death of everything it consisted of, the destruction of everything false collected through ignorance and inexperience. All these will remain in him merely as material, but subject to selection. Then a man will be able to choose for himself and not have imposed on him what others like. He will have the conscious choice.

- George Ivanovich Gurdjieff
This is the most important quote ever recorded. In two sentences Gurdjieff has summarized the process of awakening. 

I'm following Gurdjieff's words, I have no honor, no dignity, no name, no country but only a life to be lived. I'm not concerned about liking you or with being liked myself. In reality, nothing of what I do is important. Nothing. I do like whatever and whoever I want but I'm unconcerned about that.

I don't waste my energy on worrying about things. I treat you with respect but I don't involve myself in your affairs. I have no agenda or any issue to force upon you. I'm dispassionate and outside of, completely detached from society at large.

You are like fleshy robot running on outdated software. You possess immense knowledge and full capacity for thought. You competently handle all the complexities of life, family, health, finance, career, household, day in and day out, year after year. 

You are intelligent, clever, kind, honest, and fairly representative. And yet, whenever I mention spirituality, the most basic and essential facts about awakening, all I get from you is a dubious stare and skepticism.

You keep yourself strung out on medications, tranquilizers. You watch daily news, follow politics, you are all in the hands of a loving God, that is the kind of pills you like to swallow.  Means you go to a bar or church, drinking or listening to preaching... just to pass time. 

On other hand most of you are not religious and you don't have thoughts about transcendental bliss, cosmic consciousness, kundalini awakening, supreme love. You don't give a shit to reincarnation and meditation for you is a strange practice. 

Your basic knowledge about spirituality boils down to this: be nice, be quiet, smile, breathe deeply, be good, don't ask questions, don't use your minds, don't make a disturbance.

You're spiritually dead 

You have no interest of being free. Your life has been channeled safely into non-threatening, ego-gratifying activities.

Your entire life is related to your well being and you only want to maintain the same egoistic lifestyle of money, good car, nice house, polished nails etc. You have no interests to develop spiritually. In short, you are moving, doing useless things, watching others just like yourself.

You, my dear are ignorant. You believe, in the broadest sense, that something is wrong and that life itself can make it right. What that something is, what's wrong with it, and how it can be fixed all differ from everyone of you, but general pattern is always the same. 

The essence of your bondage is based on your wrong thinking. You deeply believe you have past and future, you have history. 

I'm telling you, stop being ignorant of your awakening. For that, it doesn't matter much if you meditate or not, or whether you eat meat or not, or whether you give to charities or steals from them. 

For awakening you need to dismantle your false preconceptions and get out from daily life's trap. You need to challenge your opinions; your most cherished and deeply held beliefs because they are not true. You need to see that clearly and discover your false self.

Observe yourself at work, in interaction with others, see your roles, make a study of it, and dissect it, reverse-engineer it. 

The awakening starts from there. Explore your life, strive for freedom, harden your hearth, sharpen your mind. 

Face the facts, face your mortality, see your meaninglessness. There is nothing more devastating to the ego than the contemplation of meaninglessness and insignificance. Of no-self.

You don't undergo the process of awakening out of love for the truth but out of hatred for the false: a hatred so intense that it burns everything and spares nothing. And it is that hatred that you discourage so reaching state of awakening is very hard for you.

Good luck.