Thursday, November 23, 2017

Yoga Vasistha - The Art of Self-Realization

The main theme of Yoga Vasistha is that we are undergoing a dream from which we must awake. This dream represents our association and identification with the world. Dream means that whatever is ... is false. Nothing in a dream can be true. Waking up from that dream is the ultimate goal of our living... awakening.

The First chapter, On Dispassion - The Fall of Rama.

Rama said, “... what do people call happiness and can it be had in the ever-changing objects of this world? All beings in this world take birth but to die, and they die to be born! I do not perceive any meaning in all these transient phenomena which are the roots of suffering and sin. Unrelated beings come together; and the mind conjures up a relationship between them. 

Everything in this world is dependent upon the mind, upon one’s mental attitude. On examination, the mind itself appears to be unreal! But we are bewitched by it. We seem to be running after a mirage in the desert to shake our thirst! 

Sir, surely we are not bond slaves sold to a master; yet we live a life of slavery, without any freedom whatsoever. Ignorant of Truth, we have been aimlessly wandering in the dense forest called the world. What is this world? What comes into being, grows and dies? How does this suffering come to an end? ...

Rama continued, “Equally useless, O Sage, is the wealth which deludes the ignorant. Unsteady and fleeting, this wealth gives birth to numerous worries and generates an insatiable craving for more. Wealth is no respecter of persons: both the good and the wicked can become wealthy. However, people are good, compassionate and friendly only till their hearts are hardened by the passionate pursuit of wealth. 

... Wealth and happiness do not dwell together. Rare is a wealthy man who does not have rivals and enemies who scandalize him. ... Indeed, wealth seeks him who has already been chosen by death. Even so is the life-span, O Sage. Its duration is like that of a water droplet on a leaf. The life-span is fruitful only to those who have Self-knowledge. 

... Man vainly seeks to extend his life-span, and thereby he earns more sorrow and extends the period of suffering. Only he lives who strives to gain Self-knowledge, which alone is worth gaining in this world, thereby putting an end to future births; others exist here like donkeys. ...

Rama continued, “Holy sir, I am bewildered and scared when I contemplate the coming into being of the dreadful enemy of wisdom known as egotism. It comes into being in the darkness of ignorance, and flourishes in ignorance. It generates endless sinful tendencies and sinful actions. All suffering surely revolves around egotism; and egotism is the sole cause of mental distress. I feel that egotism is my worst disease! Spreading the net of worldly objects of pleasure, it is this egotism that traps living beings. ...

Rama continued, “It is when the mind-stuff is enveloped by craving that innumerable errors arise in the darkness of ignorance thus caused. This craving dries up the good and noble qualities of the mind and heart, like sweetness and gentleness of disposition, and makes me hard and cruel. 

... Thought I adopt various methods to restrain this craving, the latter overpowers me in a moment and helplessly drives me astray, even as a gale carries a straw away. Whatever hope I entertain of developing dispassion and such other qualities, craving cuts that hope away even as a rat snaps a thread. And I helplessly revolve caught in the wheel of craving. ...

Rama said, “Even childhood, the part of life which people ignorantly regard as enjoyable and happy, is full of sorrow, O Sage. Helplessness, mishaps, carvings, inability to express oneself, utter foolishness, playfulness, instability, weakness – all these characterize childhood. 

The child is easily offended, easily roused to anger, easily bursts into tears. In fact, one may boldly say that the child’s anguish is more terrible than that of a dying person, an aged man, a sick man or of any other adult. For in childhood one’s state is comparable truly to that of an animal living at the mercy of others. ...

Rama continued, “Leaving this period of childhood behind, the human being goes on to the stage of youth, but he is unable to leave the unhappiness behind! There he is subjected to numerous mental modifications and he progresses from misery to greater misery, for he abandons wisdom and embraces the terrible goblin, known as lust, that resides in his heart. His life is full of desire and anxiety. ...

Rama continued, “In his youth, man is a slave of sexual attraction. In the body which is no more than the aggregate of flesh, blood, bone, hair and skin, he perceives beauty and charm. If this ‘beauty’ were permanent, there would be some justification to the imagination; but, alas, it does not last very long. 

On the contrary, very soon the very flesh that contributed to the attractiveness, the charm and the beauty of the beloved is transformed first into the shriveled ugliness of old age, and later consumed by fire, or by worms, or by vultures. Yet, while it lasts this sexual attraction consumes the heart and the wisdom of the man. 

... When the child is dissatisfied with its childhood, youth takes over; when youth is plagued by dissatisfaction and frustration, old age overpowers it – how cruel is life. Even as wind tosses a dew-drop from a leaf, old age destroys the body. Even as a drop of poison when it enters the system soon pervades it, senility soon pervades the entire body and breaks it down, and makes it the laughing stock of other people. 

Though the old man is unable to satisfy his desires physically, the desires themselves flourish and grow. He beings to ask himself, “Who am I? What should I do?” etc., when it is too late for him to change his life’s course, alter his life-style, or make his life more meaningful. With the onset of senility, all the distressing symptoms of a physical break-down, like cough, white hairs, hard breathing, dyspepsia and emaciation, manifest themselves. ...

Rama continued, “All enjoyments in this world are delusion, like the lunatic’s enjoyment of the taste of fruits reflected in a mirror. All the hopes of man in this world are consistently destroyed by Time. Time alone, O Sage, wears everything out in this world; there is nothing in creation which is beyond its reach. 

Time alone creates innumerable universes and in a very short time Time destroys everything. Time allows a glimpse of itself through its partial manifestation as the year, the age, the epoch; but its essential nature is hidden. This Time overpowers everything. Time is merciless, inexorable, cruel, greedy, and insatiable. Time is the greatest magician, full of deceptive tricks. 

This Time cannot be analyzed; for however much it is divided it still survives indestructible. It has an insatiable appetite for everything – it consumes the smallest insects, the biggest mountains, and even the king of heaven (Indra)! ...

Rama continued, “O sage, thus neither in childhood nor in youth nor in old age does one enjoy any happiness. None of the objects in this world is meant to give happiness to anyone. The mind vainly seeks to find such happiness in the objects of this world. Only he is happy who is free from egotism and who is not swayed by craving for sense-pleasure: but such a person is extremely rare in this world. ...

Rama continued, “By reflecting on the pitiable fate of living beings thus fallen into the dreadful pit of sorrow, I am filled with grief. My mind is confused, I shudder, and at every step I am afraid. I have given up everything, but I have not yet established myself in wisdom; hence I am partly caught and partly freed. I am like a tree that has been cut but not severed from its root. ...

Having said so, Rama remained silent.

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

An impartial critique of humanity

I am not a pessimist, I am not an optimist, I am a realist. I am stripping away delusions and leaving nothing behind but the bare naked truth. And the truth is terrifying.

Humanity is on a brink of extinction! I read that today again. So what? We are just like idiots, like robots, programmed by the society. So routinary, so weak, so masturbatory.

In general, we hate awakening. We want to hold on to hope and beliefs that life is here in order that we can learn something, grow spiritually or whatever. That's why we turn out toward religion or New Age shit which somehow make everything easy.

We lack the energy to see our real situation. We're too busy holding onto mommy's hand. Thinking how wonderful we are, how sensitive, how unique. We are not unique! We're just a copy of our parents.

To awaken means to realize one's nothingness, that is to realize one's complete and absolute mechanicalness and one's complete and absolute helplessness. And it is not sufficient to realize it philosophically in words. It is necessary to realize it in clean, simple, and concrete facts, in one's own life. - Gurdjieff 

Is it extremely melancholy to realize that nothing has any intrinsic meaning, that life is essentially meaningless? It is dangerous too. It takes courage to live life understanding that no matter what we might accomplish, will disappear like smoke in the air; that no matter what we might attempt to do, it's all useless. Not only that, but the very fact that everything is insignificant doesn't mean anything either.

The power of the false beliefs, wishful thinking and other delusions that hold over us are staggering, yet, it is necessary for the human society. The world is supported by our "sleep" and nature does not want us to "wake up".

We may know this but do we care? Fuck it, we say! We are the ultimate cynics. And that's how we live! In a deep shit. It's warm here. We don't want to leave, we hate cold. So we worry, oooh, how we worry, twenty-six hours a day! And what do you think we worry about?... About me! What about me? What's in this shit for me? What's gonna happen to me?

Do you think “wake up” are two superfluous words that don't apply to you? Obviously, you're reading this, you're “not asleep.”  Well...

Man is asleep but doesn't know it. So deep is his hypnotic slumber that he does his daily walking and talking, his legislating and marrying in a state of unconsciousness. Actually, the acts are the mechanical acts of hypnotized people... - Gurdjieff 

We're holding onto our society just like the greedy ape who reaches through an opening for a seed and cannot relinquish control, and nothing will make him drop that seed. The hand will cling even after you hack off the arm, so we too, we die holding onto this shit.

Each of us undertakes a journey to awakening in one or another way. We draw an experience into our lives in order to learn one thing - that we were wrong about it. This is what an experience really means. We are here, living this life, in order to gain knowledge about the falseness of everything.

If we want to develop spiritually or grow closer to God, or go to Heaven, or raise our consciousness by positive thinking, or get enlightenment, obtain liberation - in short, if we are moving, progressing and we feel that you grow up, well, that is the essence of our "sleep".

Growing, moving, progressing, evolving. Be nice and say we're sorry when we have done wrong and our loving God won't cook our ass. We hope for transcendental bliss, cosmic consciousness, kundalini awakening, supreme love... Nice stuff but it is all delusions.

To destroy the delusions, we must question our beliefs. Of these, the idea that we are the body with the consciousness is the worst. With the body comes the world, with the world - God, who is supposed to have created the world and thus it starts - fears, religions, bondage, spirituality, practice, sacrifices, all sorts of systems - all to protect and support "us", frightened out of our wits by monsters of our own making.

We love Jesus who is bleeding, nailed to the cross. That's our symbol. We're not interested in the Christ who was resurrected and ascended. We want to hope and wait for something better; we don't want to see the falseness of everything. We listen to our popular songs and we're crying. We turn on the television and we watch the talk shows of poor babies.... the poor babies, praying to the poor baby.

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

The point is to wake up not to earn a Ph.D. in waking up

After 16 years of spiritual search I see that books are necessary waste of time. There is nothing to be found in books but some of them are better than others. There are some essential books that every spiritual seeker should read.

Remember, the point is to wake up not to earn a Ph.D. in waking up. These books point to truth but it can not reveal it. In the end, disregarded all teachings, all books, anything put out into words and live your life as it comes.

Jed McKenna - Spiritual Enlightenment: The Damnedest Thing

This is the book. It will shake your foundation. It will spur you to question all assumptions about existence.

Imagine you’re in the audience watching a play, and you slowly come to realize that the actors don’t know they’re actors. They think that they’re normal people going about their normal lives, unaware that they’re on a stage, performing. You could never even believe such a  thing would be possible if you hadn’t been up there yourself believing the same thing.

If you have highly cherished beliefs you aren't willing to part with, this book will do no more than make you angry. I assume you are reading up on this because you aren't satisfied with your life. Remember, mind dictates reality. If your aren't willing to change your mind your reality won't change either.

Any leap in consciousness requires a dramatic rewriting of your thinking. This is really uncomfortable, and requires a willingness to abandon any concept that shows itself to be no longer useful, no matter how much we may love or value it.

In order to benefit from this book you must be willing to let go of preconceived notions. Even if an idea seems crazy, if there may be even a small peace of truth, entertain it for a while without judgment. If it resonates with your intuition move forward. If it doesn't, no harm done. Move on.

Nisargadatta Maharaj - I am That

 The only thing you should be doing while reading it is to forget all you have learned so far.

You are afraid because you have assumed something as ‘I am’, which actually you are not. Suppose you find a diamond ring on the road and you pocket it. Since it is not yours, a fear overcomes you. When you put on an identity that is not yours, you are afraid. When you are the pure ‘I amness’ only, there is no fear. 

Presently you are this ‘I am’, but this ‘I am’ is not the truth. Whatever you are prior to the appearance of ‘I am’, that is your real nature.

Just glide through the pages as you will start to realise what really real is. But the most important issue is not to be able to comprehend what is written inside but to start living it.

Q: Every morning, I pick up newspaper, and read with dismay that the world's sorrows - poverty, hatred, and wars. continue unabated. My questions concern the fact of sorrow, the cause, the remedy...

NM: You are confused, because you believe that you are in the world, not the world in you. Who came first, - you or your parents? You imagine that you were born at a certain time and place, that you have a father and a mother, a body and a name. This is your sin and your calamity! Surely, you can change your world if you work at it. By all means, work. Who stops you? I have never discouraged you. Causes or no causes, you have made this world and you can change it.

Q: A cause less world is entirely beyond my control.

NM: On the contrary, a world of which you are the only Source and ground, is fully within your power to change. What is created can always be dissolved and re-created. All will happen as you want it, provided you really want it.

Ranjit Maharaj -  Illusion vs Reality

At fist you will be deceived by Ranjit Maharaj's apparent very simple English, very straight to the point, and to make it worse, when you read the transcription, it does seem very simple, and even stupid.

All is illusion, the 'I' is illusion, so whatever the 'I' does is also illusion. Take out the thorn of the ego. Remove the name and the shape and nothing remains. In final Reality there is no 'you', no 'I', no mind and no thought. That is your natural state.

What is awakening?

Awakening is nothing but a complete, thorough understanding. A clear cut understanding of a thing is awakening. Reality is not to be achieved, it is already here. After this thorough understanding, nothing is required.

What we need to understand?

Understand that everything is illusion. Reality is beyond knowledge. Forget everything and immediately you are the Self, in this very moment. There is nothing to reject and nothing to gain because everything is nothing. You are Self without self. Understand that 'myself' is illusion. People don't understand that illusion is nothing. Understand the mind and then it doesn't remain. Not remaining as 'I' is the highest understanding.

Who reaches Reality?

The one who doesn't care about God, who doesn't care for the illusion and doesn't care for anybody. Caring for others has nothing to do with you. One who dives to the depth of the ocean finds the pearl. Go to the depth of yourself and you will find Him.


Because you don't exist. When you don't exist, then why care for others? Others don't exist. It is your love for the illusion that keeps you away from your own Self. When you see the illusion as an illusion you will stop being fooled by it. This is the true 'understanding'. You are already the Reality. Why waste time running after the unreal?

P.D. Ouspensky - In Search of the Miraculous

The author, with a beautiful gift for writing, and his beady eyed guru, hypnotist, friend (Gurdjief) were two of the most darkly fascinating characters the twentieth century had to offer.

The lessons are great, and take a lot of thought and feeling to sort through them and apply them to your life. It ties in with the inner alchemy that we must work on ourselves.

Gurdjieff's teachings deal with the mechanical, patterned behavior of man and talks much about the fragmentation of the human psyche in the terms of different 'I's'. This book requires some effort from the reader to put his assumptions aside but it's well worth it.

Gurdjieff was a charismatic spiritual teacher who taught that most humans live their lives in a state of hypnotic "waking sleep", but that it is possible to transcend to a higher state of consciousness and achieve full human potential.

Gurdjieff observed that most people are dead on the inside.

He indicated that people are passive sheep and need someone to show them the way to live a meaningful life. Gurdjieff noted that most people are neither skeptics nor self-motivated. He offered to show his followers the way to true wakefulness, a state of awareness and vitality which transcends ordinary consciousness.

If a man is deprived of his illusions, imagination and all that prevents him from seeing reality - if he is deprived of his interests, his cares, expectations and hopes - all his striving would collapse, everything would become empty and there would remain an empty being, an empty body, only physiologically alive.

This would be the death of "I", the death of everything it consisted of, the destruction of everything false collected through ignorance and inexperience. All these will remain in him merely as material, but subject to selection. Then a man will be able to choose for himself and not have imposed on him what others like. He will have the conscious choice.

Chögyam Trungpa - Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism

Chögyam Trungpa's style of teaching was often unconventional.

When we talk about compassion, we talk in terms of being kind. But compassion is not so much being kind; it is being creative to wake a person up. 

This book is worth reading. Spiritual materialism is the belief that a certain temporary state of mind is a refuge from suffering. Trungpa invites the reader to question everything, seriously question and question more, and that is what it means by term "spirituality". The overriding theme, in terms of the teachings on spiritual materialism, apply to anyone on any path.

Trungpa wore suits, spoke precise English and openly enjoyed women (in spite of being married). With Trungpa, nothing was hidden; it was up to each person to make their own judgments about the behavior of the teacher. So it took years of practice and study to understand that in Tibetan Buddhism, his outrageous "crazy wisdom teaching style" was just another tradition. Take it or leave it.

In crazy wisdom... we explore further and further and further without looking for an answer... We don't make a big point or an answer out of any one thing. For example, we might think that because we have discovered one particular thing that is wrong with us, that must be it, that must be the problem, that must be the answer. No. We don't fixate on that, we go further. "Why is that the case?" We look further and further. We ask: "Why is this so?" Why is there spirituality? Why is there awakening? Why is there this moment of relief? Why is there such a thing as discovering the pleasure of spirituality? Why, why, why?" We go on deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper, until we reach the point where there is no answer... At that point we tend to give up hope of an answer, or of anything whatsoever, for that matter... This hopelessness is the essence of crazy wisdom. It is hopeless, utterly hopeless.

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Interview with U.G Krishnamurti

U.G Krishnamurti, an enigma - a person who defies all classifications - a philosopher, a Non-guru guru, call him as you wish. Once you have read even a few words of his, your understanding will never be the same.

What am I actually searching?

- You search The Natural State. It is a state of great sensitivity - but this is a physical sensitivity of the senses, not some kind of emotional compassion or tenderness for others. There is compassion only in the sense that there are no 'others' for me, and so there is no separation. Whether you are interested in Moksha, Liberation, Freedom, Transformation, you name it, or you are interested in happiness without one moment of unhappiness, pleasure without pain, it is the same thing.

What I need to get that sensitivity? Knowledge?

-The knowledge creates the experience, and the experience strengthens knowledge. This is a vicious circle. The questioner is nothing but the answers. That is really the problem. We are not ready to accept this answer because it will put an end to the answers which we have accepted for ages as the real answers. Anything you experience based on knowledge is an illusion.

Is there Truth after all?

- There is no such thing as truth. The only thing that is actually there is your 'logically' ascertained premise, which you call truth. The body does not exist except as a thought. There is one thought. Everything exists in relation to that one thought. That thought is 'me'. Anything you experience based on thought is the illusion.

I see... I am not ready yet?

- You are not ready to accept the fact that you have to give up. A complete and total surrender. It is a state of hopelessness which says that there is no way out... Any movement in any direction, on any dimension, at any level, is taking you away from yourself... Only if you reject all the other paths can you discover your own path? Food, clothing, and shelter- these are the basic needs. Beyond that, if you want anything, it is the beginning of self-deception. Be selfish and stay selfish' is my message. Wanting enlightenment is selfishness. Charity is selfishness.

What about the world? Can I change it for the better?

- I am not in conflict with the society. I am not interested in changing it. The demand to bring about a change in myself isn't there anymore. So, the demand to change the world at large is not there. I suffer with the suffering man and am happy with the happy man... all our experiences, spiritual or otherwise, are the basic cause of our suffering....

There seems to be no way out?

- You have to be saved from the very idea that you have to be saved. You must be saved from the saviors, redeemed from the redeemers. When you know nothing, you say a lot. When you know something, there is nothing to say. You have to touch life at a point where nobody has touched it before.Nobody can teach you that. I am always emphasizing that somehow the truth has to dawn upon you that there is nothing to understand.

What are you trying to say?

- What I am trying to say is that there is no individual there at all. There is only a certain gathering of knowledge--which is thought - but no individuality there. You mistakenly believe that by pursuing the spiritual goal you will somehow miraculously make your material goals simple and manageable. We are not created for any grander purpose than the ants that are there or the flies that are hovering around us or the mosquitoes that are sucking our blood.

- It is fear that makes you believe that you are living and that you will be dead. What we do not want is the fear to come to an end. That is why we have invented all these new minds, new sciences, new talks, therapies, choiceless awareness and various other gimmicks.

- Boredom is a bottomless pit. As long as you think that there is something more interesting, more purposeful, more meaningful to do than what you are actually doing, you have no way of freeing yourself from boredom.

- You forget that everything you have around you is the creation of thought. You are yourself born out of thought, otherwise, you would not be here at all. In that sense, the thought has a tremendous value, yet it is the very thing that will destroy you.

Thursday, November 16, 2017

Where did Nibiru go?

Today I read on the internet:

Sound the alarm! We must take immediate action before it’s too late. More than 15,000 scientists from 184 countries around the world have issued a doomsday “warning to humanity.” Climate change, species extinction, deforestation and exponential human population growth are all threatening our very existence...

- Scientists Issue Doomsday “Warning To Humanity” by TRUTH THEORY

I remember that on Friday, December 21, 2012, the world supposed to end. The Nibiru collision with Earth was predicted. Mayan calendar ended that day and humanity supposed to stop existing... and nothing. Nothing happened at all.

Let's say the worst thing really happen. Would it really be so bad if my world broke apart at the seams? As I described my daily routine, it looks like my life is fairly predictable. Correct me if I am wrong, but your life is pretty much like mine. I mean, you practice, you make money, raise kids, socialize, fulfill your roles, just like everybody else. Basically, you are going slow, in small circles, toward your own grave while pretending you are not. Sure, you meditate and do whatever spiritual practice, but you know that is not really going anywhere, right? Maybe, this end-of-the-world thing could be your one real chance.

Saying "May you live in interesting times" is both a blessing and a curse. I don't live in interesting times. Five years ago, Nibiru did not cause the meltdown of an advanced technological civilization. All pretense at decency and morality are still in place. The masks of the world: kindness, love, and compassion are still in place. We missed the mass awakening, where millions of people could get very real, very fast.

Today's warning about human species extinction is a slow death comparing with the Nibiru. Nibiru could be the death-rebirth process but on a planetary scale. This whole ego based society burns down to the ground and then something rises from the ashes. A human re-evolution. Cool thing. Now compare that to today's bland little warning published by Truth Theory.

I say, holy shit, stop, please stop! Stop spewing hot garbage about some made-up statistical facts by someone’s ridiculous fake concern for humanity.

I don’t care about your religious beliefs. But I care about awakening so can you please ignore the screaming from such doomsday articles. Now forget about that insane report for just one second. The world really is falling apart but not from "outside" of humanity but from our society, we built so far.

The crooked political system, the distorted entertainment industry, false news, and advertisements, phony medical and pharmaceutical industry, dishonest food industry, travel and working conditions, constant wars and loss of basic human rights are our reality.

Humankind has been aspiring to be the machine for a few decades now and eventually the effects of this aspiration become more and more apparent as toxins build up everywhere...

Awake,arise,and assert yourself, you dreamers of the world. Your star is now in ascendancy.
- Napoleon Hill

Awake! Stop comforting yourself with the old fairy tales, stories of good and evil and shitty positive thinking. Live life in the moment. Feel more, play more, enjoy the row feelings. Allow the deepest despair and the most ecstatic joy to pass through you. Don’t judge or try to get rid of them. Be alive. You are life itself, inseparable from the universe.

The world really does not exist. It is all what you make, what you think about. Live at the point of insecurity, nothing to hold onto, no concept to bring to a weary mind. And yet, you'll feel the deepest kind of security of all, a security deep within your being, the security of what you are.

Awake, I bow to your courage.